Merry Christmas to Y'all. Whatever you're doing, wherever you are, however you celebrate.
Our weatherman forecasts a "wintry mix" for tonight. It's 41 right now with a wind chill of 38. I like it! It's 65 inside, I'm bundled up in sweater/scarf/tall boots. Cozy. Candles burning. Me listening to Led Zepplin and Simon and Garfunkel.
A couple of neighbors stopped by with baked goods, I delivered a few myself. There's a neighborhood block party/open house later tonight. We'll stroll down for a hot drink.
Not a lot of decorating done around here, but hubby and I both had an artsy/crafty day yesterday. He's hiding something in the garage that he's been working on. He raided my Tim Holtz drawer of supplies, and made off with handfulls of stuff. Well, yes I said he could use whatever he wanted....I am afraid.
Today is my parents 69th wedding anniversary. Will call them in awhile. As a kid, we always opened our family gifts on Christmas Eve, then Mom and Dad went out dancing. Christmas morning we trekked 35 miles to Grandmas house, with all the Aunts and Uncles and many cousins. Forever, all the days of my childhood. Good memories.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
Striving for Serenity
Settling for Simplicity. It's all I can do right now. Some holiday seasons I can "get with it", this is not one of those years. I've been struck by the normal holiday melancholy I seem to have become inflicted with, gradually over the years. I didn't used to have it. I once was one of those Martha Stewart clones, a tree in every room, lots of baking and entertaining. All the trimmings so to speak. Besides working full time, I drove myself crazy to get all this done. By the time Christmas day came, all I wanted to do was lay down under that tree and go to sleep! That was in my "perfection years" and those days are long gone, thankfully.
Well, I know good and well all families have strife and sadness, it's just part of living. This year has been a particularily hard one for both mine and hubbies. We're just kind of skating over Christmas this year. We've never been caught up in the "buy, buy, buy" part of the holidays, so it's been even easier to scale back. Staying OUT of the department stores has been such a relief. The few gifts we have bought have all been handmade, from various Arts&Crafts shows from around town, or by me. Fortunately, the people I know and love and give gifts to appreciate handmade.
So, yesterday afternoon, I sat in front of the window, in hubby's big leather chair, for a good long time. I drank tea, watched the neighbors cat chase the blowing leaves, read the entire Sunday paper, drank more tea. Then I addressed the last few cards while hubby cooked us bacon, turkey and swiss cheese paninis. Pretty darn good...It was applewood smoked, thick sliced bacon, and NOT even low sodium. After dinner we both called our families and even that was nice and relaxing. My Dad never wants to stay on the phone for more than a few minutes, but he was very talkative last night. After reading for awhile and doing a bit of yoga, I fell asleep and didn't wake up once during the night. Very unusual for me. So I felt rested and really had a better outlook this morning. It's dreary and misty outside and I have stayed in all morning, and think I will not go out the rest of the day. I have some candles burning and am listing to Pandora radio. Cozy, that's me
Well, I know good and well all families have strife and sadness, it's just part of living. This year has been a particularily hard one for both mine and hubbies. We're just kind of skating over Christmas this year. We've never been caught up in the "buy, buy, buy" part of the holidays, so it's been even easier to scale back. Staying OUT of the department stores has been such a relief. The few gifts we have bought have all been handmade, from various Arts&Crafts shows from around town, or by me. Fortunately, the people I know and love and give gifts to appreciate handmade.
So, yesterday afternoon, I sat in front of the window, in hubby's big leather chair, for a good long time. I drank tea, watched the neighbors cat chase the blowing leaves, read the entire Sunday paper, drank more tea. Then I addressed the last few cards while hubby cooked us bacon, turkey and swiss cheese paninis. Pretty darn good...It was applewood smoked, thick sliced bacon, and NOT even low sodium. After dinner we both called our families and even that was nice and relaxing. My Dad never wants to stay on the phone for more than a few minutes, but he was very talkative last night. After reading for awhile and doing a bit of yoga, I fell asleep and didn't wake up once during the night. Very unusual for me. So I felt rested and really had a better outlook this morning. It's dreary and misty outside and I have stayed in all morning, and think I will not go out the rest of the day. I have some candles burning and am listing to Pandora radio. Cozy, that's me
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Another Anniversary
That time again. Another year flew by. On this day, 38 years ago, the hubster and I were married. All odds were against us for a variety of reasons. Then, the church we were married in burned down. The next year our minister got a divorce. The list goes on, but the thing about getting older is you can't recall most of the things that threatend to "do you in". Here we are still side by side. Unbelievable, I can hardly say the words 38 years.... people look at us like we should be ancient in wheel chairs, at least all the younger people we know.
As has happened for at least half of those years, hubby is out of town on business. So we celebrate whenever we can, but rarely on the actual day. We went out to dinner a couple of nights ago, for a fine steak and a bit of wine. We shared this cute little pumpkin spice tid-bit for dessert. When we first saw it, we thought we should have ordered two, but it was so incredibly sweet, it was just the right amount.
I've had a blog malfunction. While poting from hotel in San Diego (my last post) I somehow managed to disable the comment feature. I don't know how or what I did, or how to fix it. So this is a test to see if it was just a fluke. So here goes.
As has happened for at least half of those years, hubby is out of town on business. So we celebrate whenever we can, but rarely on the actual day. We went out to dinner a couple of nights ago, for a fine steak and a bit of wine. We shared this cute little pumpkin spice tid-bit for dessert. When we first saw it, we thought we should have ordered two, but it was so incredibly sweet, it was just the right amount.
I've had a blog malfunction. While poting from hotel in San Diego (my last post) I somehow managed to disable the comment feature. I don't know how or what I did, or how to fix it. So this is a test to see if it was just a fluke. So here goes.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Sunny California Sunday
I'm blogging from San Diego. It's pretty nice here in the Marina. This is the view I've had to endure for the past few days. This photo was taken while sitting in bed with the balcony door open. Nice crisp mornings and evenings. Warm, nice days. Except for the day it rained like crazy all day, and we were like drowned rats because we were out in it. Sleeping with the door wide open each night. No bugs, and no allergies. It really does feel like paradise.
Hubby and I came out a couple days early for the trade show, which started today. We played tourists, went to Coronado Island for one day, have ridden the trolley/train all over San Diego, found Anthropology store and visted there. Seaport Village is right next door to the hotel. We are also near the GasLight district, and there are a lot of interesting things to see there. I've walked miles, and it felt good. Have a few more adventures planned, between trade show duties and business dinners.
Hubby and I came out a couple days early for the trade show, which started today. We played tourists, went to Coronado Island for one day, have ridden the trolley/train all over San Diego, found Anthropology store and visted there. Seaport Village is right next door to the hotel. We are also near the GasLight district, and there are a lot of interesting things to see there. I've walked miles, and it felt good. Have a few more adventures planned, between trade show duties and business dinners.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Halloween and Dia de los Muertos
Halloween and Dia de los Muertos have always been my favorite holidays to decorate for and take part in. This year it crept up on me so fast and we had so much going on that I really didn't do any decorating. Did I send any cards...Nope, not a one. I have almost every Halloween decoration Martha Stewart has put out over the years, plus boxes of vintage stuff. I used to love to decorate the house, inside and out, and we even dressed up to hand out treats. Just haven't been into it that much this year. But you know what...turn around and blink and it will be next year again. Another chance to start earlier, and be in a better frame of mind as well.
This spooky card is from my friend Pam in Ohio. The friend I met through the INTERNET some 10 years or so ago. The friend who hopped on a plane and came to Texas for Thanksgiving. I don't recall how many years ago that was for sure, but she has been out a couple of times since. She is coming again this year. I can't wait to see her. We have totally different lives, but a common interest in ART, music, and other creative endeavors. The thing about a friend like this, is we can see each other only every few years, but it's like no time has passed. We pick up right where we left off.
I did unpack a few Day of the Dead things, but never got around to setting them out. Here are a couple of my favorite sugar skulls. I did not even buy a new one this year. My favorite one will always be the Frida.
Poor Frida, last year she had an accident and a few of the flowers in her head dress broke off. Must repair them before she goes back in her case for the next year.
Frida's broken flowers.
This spooky card is from my friend Pam in Ohio. The friend I met through the INTERNET some 10 years or so ago. The friend who hopped on a plane and came to Texas for Thanksgiving. I don't recall how many years ago that was for sure, but she has been out a couple of times since. She is coming again this year. I can't wait to see her. We have totally different lives, but a common interest in ART, music, and other creative endeavors. The thing about a friend like this, is we can see each other only every few years, but it's like no time has passed. We pick up right where we left off.
I did unpack a few Day of the Dead things, but never got around to setting them out. Here are a couple of my favorite sugar skulls. I did not even buy a new one this year. My favorite one will always be the Frida.
Poor Frida, last year she had an accident and a few of the flowers in her head dress broke off. Must repair them before she goes back in her case for the next year.
Frida's broken flowers.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Blue Skies Above and Fall Festivals
No matter how life is going, you can always look up and the sky is still there. Lately it has been such a brilliant blue. I love how the sky looks in the fall. The clouds are crisp, even if the air is not yet. In Texas it never feels to me like FALL...We go from hot hot hot to an ice storm, usually. It has been cool in the mornings, but not crisp like I prefer fall to be.
At least it's cool enough to start baking. I've made Pumpkin Scones last week, and these are Cranberry. Both were pretty tasty.
The world keeps turning. It has now been 10 days since Hubby's mother passed. It does not seem possible. Some days it seems like it has been longer, some days we speak of her and it seems like yesterday. Hubby is doing fine, it helps that he is in close touch by phone with his siblings, and knows he can talk whenever he feels like it. I had the weirdest feeling the other night, when it struck me that never again will I have to, or be able to, remind him to call his Mom. He used to get so busy that a few weeks would go by and I would always say "please call your Mom".
I had thought it might be too soon for us to go to the Dia de los Muertos Festival this past week-end. He said it was okay, and I think it may have been therapeutic. Too soon for a shrine for his Mom though. Probably next year.
I'm a bit disappointed in this years photos. For some reason the settings on my camera went a little wacky. I didn't get many of the parade at all, the streets were so crowded. I did get a few costumes and make-ups that I'll share. I totally loved the girl in the pink hair, because she was wearing a little golden antler on top!
At least it's cool enough to start baking. I've made Pumpkin Scones last week, and these are Cranberry. Both were pretty tasty.
The world keeps turning. It has now been 10 days since Hubby's mother passed. It does not seem possible. Some days it seems like it has been longer, some days we speak of her and it seems like yesterday. Hubby is doing fine, it helps that he is in close touch by phone with his siblings, and knows he can talk whenever he feels like it. I had the weirdest feeling the other night, when it struck me that never again will I have to, or be able to, remind him to call his Mom. He used to get so busy that a few weeks would go by and I would always say "please call your Mom".
I had thought it might be too soon for us to go to the Dia de los Muertos Festival this past week-end. He said it was okay, and I think it may have been therapeutic. Too soon for a shrine for his Mom though. Probably next year.
I'm a bit disappointed in this years photos. For some reason the settings on my camera went a little wacky. I didn't get many of the parade at all, the streets were so crowded. I did get a few costumes and make-ups that I'll share. I totally loved the girl in the pink hair, because she was wearing a little golden antler on top!
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Unsettled, Fragmented, Distracted
That's how I've been feeling, since our latest trip to Idaho and Oregon. Wanting to post, but not quite knowing what to say. Or, I guess, how to put into words what I'm feeling. We've been on this path for some time. Health issues that come from having aged parents. Each illness, each episode, threatens to take them from us, each time they bounce back. Until the next time. It's always like waiting for the other shoe to drop.
In any family, when the diagnosis is cancer, it's a frightening feeling. You have no control over the outcome. You can do whatever is medically available, all the time praying that it will work. Knowing that it might not. That word changes everything. You must continue to live a normal life and take care of the every day things that need taking care of. But somewhere in a back corner of your brain, that shadow lurks, waiting to come to the forefront of all else.
As a family, we have walked this road with my Father several times in the past 20 years. Three different episodes with cancer. Add to that a heart attack, hip replacement, many other broken bones as well. Most of those as a result of falling. He is tough as nails and has made it to 96 years of age. I'm not sure I can even count or recall all the things he has been through. He wears a button on his vest that reads "At my age, I've survived damn near everything".
My Mother was always pretty healthy, up until the past few years. She's had gallbladder problems, and a few other things that knocked her down, but she always got back up. About 18 months ago, she was diagnosed with macular degeneration. She has undergone many eye injections since then and the Dr. says it is halting it's progression somewhat. However we have seen a serious decline in her ability to manage. Two of the things that were her hobbies, reading and crochet, she can no longer do. That has taken a toll on her mental outlook. Plus she can no longer keep a close eye on my Dad in an attempt to prevent him from doing foolish things that cause him to fall down. She has begun to suffer from anxiety attacks. I'm sure I would do the same if I could not see.
I have felt so fortunate to have had my parents live this long. It's difficult to live so far from family, because when something happens you cannot get there quickly. Hub and I both have done our best to be there a couple of times a year just for visits, when nothing is wrong. The trips have become more frequent as more and more things have happened, and now we usually go because something has happened.
We visited in March. My Dad was in the rehab center again, after cracking a bone in his leg(the same one they did a hip replacement on exactly a year before. We spent some days there, then went to Portland to visit Hubs family. Everyone was fine, we had a great time. My Mother-in-law has been living with Emphysema for several years, but doing quite well. The only thing that had changed in recent years, was her lung function had decreased to the point she was on oxygen 100% of the time. Still, she was doing well. Around June she told us she had been on antibiotics for an infection, and that she had complained to her Drs. of severe back pain. They attributed it to the hauling around of the oxygen tanks, and gave her pain meds. She was afraid of getting hooked on them, so she tried to get by on as few as possible. Finally the pain got so unbearable that the Dr. decided to do a MRI...that led to a PET scan, and a diagnosis of cancer. Bone cancer. It had apparently spread quickly, in her ribs and her hip. She had just had a chest ex-ray 6 months earlier and everything there was fine. The diagnosis came the end of August and the prognosis was possibly 6 months to live. We flew back out to Boise the first week in September, I stayed there to spend time with my parents. While there, my Dad did something foolish and fell again. None of us can convince him to let us help him with ANYTHING! Hub went to Portland to spend time with his Mom for a week. They spent some time talking about and making arrangements for us to visit again at Christmas time. Because of her weakened lung condition, they decided against radiation for the pain. At any rate we came home Sept. 17th.. October 9th we received word that she had taken a turn for the worse. Hubby left the next day. She had experienced 4 days of being completely incoherent, agitated and quite out of it. She then had 2 days of being rational and awake and alert while he was there. Then she had another couple of days that were pretty bad. Hubby flew home last night, arriving in Austin at 1 a.m. When we awoke this morning we got a call from his sister Jeri, that Mom had passed peacefully in her sleep at 4:30 this morning. As sad as we all are, we are also thankful that it was a relatively short time after the diagnosis, and she did not spend an extended time suffering.
Janet Merle Day Dunbar was 78 years old.
Needless to say, we are feeling a range of emotions, and this is sinking in a little bit at a time. Everything was prepared for in advance as far as arrangements go.
In any family, when the diagnosis is cancer, it's a frightening feeling. You have no control over the outcome. You can do whatever is medically available, all the time praying that it will work. Knowing that it might not. That word changes everything. You must continue to live a normal life and take care of the every day things that need taking care of. But somewhere in a back corner of your brain, that shadow lurks, waiting to come to the forefront of all else.
As a family, we have walked this road with my Father several times in the past 20 years. Three different episodes with cancer. Add to that a heart attack, hip replacement, many other broken bones as well. Most of those as a result of falling. He is tough as nails and has made it to 96 years of age. I'm not sure I can even count or recall all the things he has been through. He wears a button on his vest that reads "At my age, I've survived damn near everything".
My Mother was always pretty healthy, up until the past few years. She's had gallbladder problems, and a few other things that knocked her down, but she always got back up. About 18 months ago, she was diagnosed with macular degeneration. She has undergone many eye injections since then and the Dr. says it is halting it's progression somewhat. However we have seen a serious decline in her ability to manage. Two of the things that were her hobbies, reading and crochet, she can no longer do. That has taken a toll on her mental outlook. Plus she can no longer keep a close eye on my Dad in an attempt to prevent him from doing foolish things that cause him to fall down. She has begun to suffer from anxiety attacks. I'm sure I would do the same if I could not see.
I have felt so fortunate to have had my parents live this long. It's difficult to live so far from family, because when something happens you cannot get there quickly. Hub and I both have done our best to be there a couple of times a year just for visits, when nothing is wrong. The trips have become more frequent as more and more things have happened, and now we usually go because something has happened.
We visited in March. My Dad was in the rehab center again, after cracking a bone in his leg(the same one they did a hip replacement on exactly a year before. We spent some days there, then went to Portland to visit Hubs family. Everyone was fine, we had a great time. My Mother-in-law has been living with Emphysema for several years, but doing quite well. The only thing that had changed in recent years, was her lung function had decreased to the point she was on oxygen 100% of the time. Still, she was doing well. Around June she told us she had been on antibiotics for an infection, and that she had complained to her Drs. of severe back pain. They attributed it to the hauling around of the oxygen tanks, and gave her pain meds. She was afraid of getting hooked on them, so she tried to get by on as few as possible. Finally the pain got so unbearable that the Dr. decided to do a MRI...that led to a PET scan, and a diagnosis of cancer. Bone cancer. It had apparently spread quickly, in her ribs and her hip. She had just had a chest ex-ray 6 months earlier and everything there was fine. The diagnosis came the end of August and the prognosis was possibly 6 months to live. We flew back out to Boise the first week in September, I stayed there to spend time with my parents. While there, my Dad did something foolish and fell again. None of us can convince him to let us help him with ANYTHING! Hub went to Portland to spend time with his Mom for a week. They spent some time talking about and making arrangements for us to visit again at Christmas time. Because of her weakened lung condition, they decided against radiation for the pain. At any rate we came home Sept. 17th.. October 9th we received word that she had taken a turn for the worse. Hubby left the next day. She had experienced 4 days of being completely incoherent, agitated and quite out of it. She then had 2 days of being rational and awake and alert while he was there. Then she had another couple of days that were pretty bad. Hubby flew home last night, arriving in Austin at 1 a.m. When we awoke this morning we got a call from his sister Jeri, that Mom had passed peacefully in her sleep at 4:30 this morning. As sad as we all are, we are also thankful that it was a relatively short time after the diagnosis, and she did not spend an extended time suffering.
Janet Merle Day Dunbar was 78 years old.
Needless to say, we are feeling a range of emotions, and this is sinking in a little bit at a time. Everything was prepared for in advance as far as arrangements go.
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